Warning - this post
is long because I found it hard to concisely capture the experience. So hee hee
hee hoo - here it goes:
PART 1: Preparing for labor
This being my first
baby, I didn't know what to expect on the big labor and delivery day. I was at
the birth of my nephew 10 years ago, but I mostly remember it being like in the
movies. It was Christmas eve and at 2am my sister's water broke; we rushed to
the hospital; and Logan was born four hours later. I was so focused on my cute
little nephew, I didn't store in my memory bank everything else that went on
that day.
So I was surprised
to learn at our labor and delivery class that most births were NOT like in the movies at all. Our teacher told
us the average number of hours a first pregnancy labor takes is 24. That's twenty-four hours people - a whole
day! And that's on average - so it could be more (or less). I was shocked. That
seems like an awful long time of discomfort and pain. I was glad we were
taking this class so we would know what to do.
My main takeaways from labor and delivery class
- The majority of the labor will take place at home, not
at the hospital. In fact if you go to the hospital too early they will
send you home! The general rule of thumb is 4-1-1. The hospital usually
does not admit you unless your contractions are 4 minutes apart or
shorter, last for at least 1 minute and they are that way for at least 1
hour.
- Drink - Pee - Move - Time - Eat: Every
hour from the beginning of labor I should stay hydrated, empty my bladder,
move/change position, time contractions and eat! They called this
"Basic Comfort."
- Breathing
was essential: I should start and end every contraction with a
"cleansing breath," breaths should be slow, deep and relaxed
with one example being "hee hee hee hoo." The hoo was low and
extended - like this - hoooooooooooo
- Items that might be useful to get: an
exercise ball (good for laboring and for bouncing a crying baby once it's
born), popsicles and comfort foods for eating during labor, and a music
playlist in the event that I'd want to listen to my favorite tunes while
in labor. I got all of these, but used none, except a half of one popsicle.
 |
| Adam at our class |
In addition to
making sure I memorized all the helpful tips from class and stocked our
cupboard with the recommended snacks, I read about how to prepare for labor on
babycenter.com and watched real life labor and delivery videos from the site.
The best
preparation, however, was being with my twin sister when she gave birth to my
nephew Isaac just 6 weeks before Rosalie was born. I was there to see her labor
at home for over 12 hours and then also at the hospital where she labored for
another 12 hours before my beautiful nephew was born. My takeaway from that
experience was - oh schnikees this looks like it's going to hurt!
PART 2: The pre-labor signs
(Sunday and Monday, September 7th and 8th)
- Exhaustion - Rosalie's original due
date was September 4th and my sister Nikki was in town from the 3rd - 7th
in hopes that Rosalie would be on time, plus or minus a day. But alas, it
was not to be and after dropping Nik off at the airport on Sunday, Adam
and I headed to Ikea to get a few picture frames for Rosalie's room. I was
so exhausted afterwards that I took
a four-hour nap once we got home. We had stayed up a little late the night
before, but I hadn't been that exhausted in a while. We didn't do much the
rest of the day and had an early dinner before heading to bed at around
9:30pm.
- Bloody show
- As soon as
I laid down to sleep, I felt a little rush of fluid and immediately
thought my water broke. However, after referencing my handy dandy
"What to expect when you're expecting " guide book I determined
what I felt and saw was something called "bloody show."
According to the book, "This show usually
means labor will start within 24 hours." I was uncomfortable, nervous
and excited all at the same time. Adam had already dozed off to sleep, but
I couldn't sleep at all. So I assumed my position out on our lazy boy
couch (where I slept when I got heart burn - a frequent occurrence towards
the end of pregnancy) and surfed the net to learn more about this blood
show business.
- Increase in
urination
- It was a sleepless night as I was up often to go to the bathroom.
The next morning I
was pretty exhausted, but very excited about the prospects of going into labor.
I still hadn't felt a contraction, at least that I could truly identify. My
plan was to sleep most of the day in order to be well-rested for the labor that
I knew was soon to come. But instead of sleeping I spent the day writing email,
reading the news, and watching a very unexciting US Open men's final. I didn't
feel any contractions during the day, but did feel a little bit funny and kept
seeing the bloody show.
I spoke with my mom
who was debating whether or not to come that evening or the next day. I told
her it was probably fine to come the next day as I thought Rosalie probably
wouldn't come til the following evening…
PART 3: Laboring alone
begins (late Monday night, September 8th)
Monday evening we
had an early dinner and headed to bed at 9:30pm. At about 11:30pm I woke up
suddenly with a bit of a cramping feeling and the urge to go the bathroom. I
didn't register that this was a contraction, but this was the start of my
labor.
Adam was snoozing
soundly and I didn't want to disturb him with what I thought was just going to
be me getting up to go the bathroom constantly like I did the night before. So
I took my pillow to the living room and propped up on the lazy boy couch again. I was so tired from not sleeping much the
night before or during that day and craved some shut eye.
I leaned back and
closed my eyes and probably 15 minutes later the uncomfortable cramping feeling
along with the bathroom urge came on
again. I kept feeling the need to have a bowel movement, but couldn't go. For
the next hour I was getting up like this
every 20 minutes or so. The discomfort got progressively worse and I started
having to get up more often. No longer could I even lean back on the couch
before having to get up and the discomfort was turning into pain. It finally
clicked with me that I was in labor.
 |
| Various Laboring Positions |
I started using my
"hee hee hee hoooooooo" breathing technique and also got my water
bottle to make sure I drank in between contractions. The best I can describe
the feeling was a super painful menstrual cramp combined with a need to take a
really painful poo. In the beginning I sat on the toilet when having a
contraction, but after a while I couldn't take sitting and the only
comfortable position was standing and leaning against the wall while swaying
back and forth. I tried many of the laboring positions we learned in class (see
photo) but the only one that I could get through a contraction was the standing
and leaning against a wall one. In between contractions I would walk to the
bathroom and try to go and would also drink water. I was not hungry one bit. So
of the Drink-Pee-Move-Time-Eat advice, I was doing 3 of the 5.
PART 4: Time to wake up Adam
Finally, at 3:30am I
couldn't bear it any longer and woke up Adam. My legs were so tired from
standing and I was exhausted from lack of sleep. I was worried that I wasn't
going to have any energy by the time I got to the hospital and hoping that Adam would somehow help me rest a little.
The problem was that
I only felt comfortable standing up. I asked/told Adam, "How am I going to
get to the hospital if I can't sit down in the car? I have to be able to get
through a contraction sitting down." I had set up a chair backwards against
our dining room table and put a pillow on the table earlier in the morning with
hopes of straddling the chair and resting during the contractions. But I hadn't
tried that position in a few hours. With Adam there I was relieved to try it
again.
 |
| "A contraction is like climbing a mountain..." |
What was getting me
through my contractions was my "hee hee hee hoos" and the image I
remember from class. Our teacher told us to visualize a contraction like
climbing a mountain. The contraction is small at first and then builds up to
the most intense pain; but as soon as you reach the peak, it's all downhill
from there. You just have to reach the top and you're through to the other
side. She also told us that during a
contraction you obviously will tense up, but if you focus on relaxing as much
of your body as you can, like your face, limbs, etc. it would really help with
the pain. With these three ideas, I was finally able to sit down through the
contractions.
Adam dutifully timed
my contractions and made sure that I drank water. He brought me popsicles which
were helpful for a little while, but I didn't have much of an appetite. All I
remember was being so thankful to be sitting down and resting my head. I would
fall asleep for what I thought was 15 minutes, but Adam said it was only about
2 minutes, before saying "here it goes again," and starting my
breathing routine to get through a contraction. After about 2 hours of having
the 4-1-1 contractions, Adam called our doctor's office to see if they agreed
that it was time to come in. It was around 7am. The doctor called us back 30
minutes later and told us to come on in.
I stayed resting my
head on the table while Adam scurried around the house gathering our bags and
the last minute items I had written down on a post-it note. He texted our
families that we were headed to the hospital and my phone started ringing with calls from my sisters and mom, who wasn't landing until 1:15pm. There was
no way I could even talk. "I can't talk to anyone," and "Adam -
we need to go now!" I remember
saying, as he was stuffing a small cooler with popsicles in one hand and
carrying the exercise ball in his other hand. I yelled, "I don't care
about the popsicles!"
I "hee hee hee
hoo'd" during the 15 minute car ride with my eyes closed the entire way.
Adam pulled up to the hospital's valet parking, about 20 feet from the
entrance. He helped me out of the car and I couldn't get 5 steps without a
contraction rearing it's ugly head and stopping us in our tracks. Good thing a
nurse walking into the hospital got us a wheel chair or else I don't know how
long it would have taken us to walk in.
PART 5: At the hospital
(Tuesday, September 9th - 8:45am)
 |
| Lovely chart showing stages of labor |
Once on the third
floor of the hospital, Adam checked us in while I sat in the
wheel chair doing my hee hee hee hoos. They took us to the triage room and a
wonderful nurse, Jenn L., had me get on a bed so she could check how far along
I was. Eight centimeters! She couldn't
believe, and neither could I, that I labored at home for all that time. I
jokingly asked, "So you're not going to send me back home?"
"No," she said, "we're taking you to a delivery room now."
We requested one of
the bigger rooms that had a bathtub. And I'm so grateful we did because that
bathtub was key to getting me through to 10 centimeters. Jenn filled the
bathtub up with hot water and had me get on my hands in knees in the tub with
my head resting on a ledge. She placed a warm towel on my back and Adam's job for
the next hour and a half was to shower my back with hot water. This relieved my
horrendous lower back pain almost immediately because being in the water helped
the baby to float, relieving the pressure..but only for a while.
Jenn was preparing
the delivery room but kept checking on us every so often. Soon I felt the urge
to push and it was pain I had never felt before. Jenn had me get out of the tub
and onto the bed. During this transition from the tub to the bed, my twin sister,
Renee arrived. My lower back was killing me and Ren and Adam took turns
massaging my back and squeezing my hips together to help relieve the pressure.
Soon I was on my back and the doctor arrived. It was 11am and it was time to
start pushing.
PART 6: Let the pushing
begin! (Tuesday, September 9th - 11am)
When it was time to
start pushing I was spent. But Adam, Ren and Jenn were cheering me on as I took
deep breaths in and then "beared" down trying to push out this little
baby. It really does feel like you're trying to take the biggest poop of your
life...and you're constipated. In other words - it frickin hurts and is way
uncomfortable.
To give you a decent
idea of the set-up- I was on my back on the bed that was titled up so I was
somewhat sitting up. My legs were spread open. Adam was on one side of the bed
and Jenn was on the other. During a contraction (when I would push) I would put
one foot in Adam's hand and the other in Jenn's as they held my legs up. I would
grab the underside of my quads, curl my neck and head towards my stomach, take
a deep breath and then push like I was going number two. The idea was to try
and hold the push for 10 seconds, which was really hard to do.
When it comes to the
pushing stage, most women must push pretty fast because I remember Jenn saying
it would probably only be another 10
minutes or so. But I knew, from seeing Ren push for 3 hours just 6 weeks before
that it could take longer. The doctor gave me some Lidocaine, a local
anesthetic to help numb the burn for what they call "the ring of
fire" or expanded opening where the baby comes out.
After about an hour
of pushing, the top of Rosalie's head was showing. The doctor was worried about
Rosalie because the external monitors weren't reading her heart rate very
accurately. The doctor asked if she could attach a monitor to Rosalie's head to
get a better read of her heart rate. We didn't want her to at first, but
eventually complied. They also gave me an oxygen mask, which only made it
harder for me when it came time to push. What did help was a stand up mirror
they brought in so that I could see what was going on down there. I was having
trouble holding my pushes long enough (I was exhausted!) and so my pushes
weren't super effective. The mirror helped me see how I was doing during the
pushes.
The doctor was
worried about Rosalie being stressed and also could see that the umbilical cord
was wrapped loosely around her neck. There were about 10 times where they
thought I'd push Rosalie out. It's funny to watch the 10 iphone videos that Ren took
because she thought it was going to be THE push! It was the doctor's threat that she would need to use the vacuum to get Rosalie out that motivated me to the finish line. With two more pushes Rosalie's whole head was out. The doctor told me to stop for a second while
she unwrapped the cord from Rosalie's neck and then asked me to push again. And with a super easy push the rest of Rosalie's body came out.
They quickly put
Rosalie onto me while they wiped her off and did the visual checks to make
sure she was okay. Rosalie was crying up a storm - a good sign! She was
delivered less than 4 hours after my check-in at 12:33pm weighing 5 pounds,
14 ounces and measuring 19.5 inches long.
 |
| First photo of Rosalie - she came out crying! |
 |
| Our first family photo: My face was super swollen and my eyes were bloodshot. Apparently I was pushing a lot with my face. Rosalie spent the first night in the NICU because she had low blood sugar levels. |
